Booyah Octo-Mom

This morning I found out that if I was bat-shit crazy, I could potentially beat the Octo-Mom in her quest to carry an obscene amount of children.

No, I'm not currently pregnant. I found out that the reason I've felt like complete shit and I'm tired as hell is because my body has "hyper-produced" a crap-load of follicles this month.

NOTE: This is the phrasing that is used. Follicles are not actually created each cycle, follicles grow bigger each cycle -- indicating how many eggs will be released.

QUESTION: How many is a "crap-load"?

ANSWER: At least twelve. I say "at least" twelve, because I'm not sure how many it was. A lot.

On my "cycle tracking sheet" there are six areas where they can document follicle development. Six areas per ovary. Two ovaries x six areas = twelve follicles. I know that it was way more than twelve though, because every box had at least two follicles listed in it.

Here's what I mean. Here's what a standard month looks like:

Right Ovary
1 - 16 mm
1 - 14 mm -- meaning I have a follicle at 14 mm (18 - 22 is mature or ready to lay an egg).

Today's report looked something like this:

Right Ovary
2 - 16 mm
3 - 14 mm
3 - 13 mm
...

Yeah, that's a lot of eggs.

So, I had to have this conversation with the nurse:

NURSE: "I think the doctor is going to recommend cancelling your cycle or only going with intercourse. I don't think she's going to want to do an IUI. Are you comfortable with this?"

ME: "No. I want to move forward with an IUI."

NURSE: "Have we talked to you about "selective reduction?"

NOTE: Selective reduction = If you get prego with a ton of babies, they go in with a needle and selectively reduce the number of babies. I don't care what your pro-life/anti-life opinion is. I'm not gonna have a litter of kids. You're welcome to make your own decision for yourself.

ME: "Yeah. I'm totally comfortable with selective reduction. Let's move forward. You can have it in writing that I'm not moving forward in being prego with more than two kids."

NURSE: "Well, OK. We'll see what the doctor says."